The future.

I'm destined to be alone.
I genuinely think I am.

I'm a paranoid, anti-social, self-loathing obsessive compulsive self-harmer with severe trust issues who hates physical contact and intimacy. I dislike people in general, I hate everything about myself and I tend to refuse to confront my feelings about someone because I know I'm not good enough for them.

If I don't want to die alone, I need to find someone who can deal with a girlfriend being all of these things. And I also have to trust them enough to actually get close to me. As well as feel something more for them than friendship.

It's just not going to happen.